Friday Diversion #6: Oh, the Irony!

Today’s diversion comes from the mother of all joke sources: an EEOC press release.

Earlier this week, the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission announced that it had filed suit against a national employer for disability discrimination. I know, I know. On its own, that doesn’t sound funny at all.

But when the employer is the Scooter Store, that maven of mid-day TV “Medicare-will-pay-for-it” advertising, I’m sorry, that’s frigging hilarious.

After the title, though, the rest of the press release is not as entertaining:

The EEOC’s lawsuit … alleges that The Scooter Store failed to accommodate an employee’s request for a reasonable accommodation for his disability, psoriatic arthritis, after he sustained a knee injury that required a temporary absence from work. The EEOC’s suit states that the employee timely informed the company he was incapacitated until further notice and that he required a leave of absence to seek treatment for his disability. However, The Scooter Store refused his request and instead fired him, purportedly for job abandonment, although he had presented medical documentation.

What it is, of course, is ironic. And not just in the 1990′s pop music way. This is the classical literature, Greek Philosophy sort of irony. A disability store! Discriminating against a disabled person! And they make scooters! And his disability was a knee injury, which would potentially require a scooter!!

ARE YOU GETTING THIS?!  IRONY!

It’s entirely possible that I only think this is funny because I was an English major at Iowa, and had to debate what irony was with a bunch of Writer’s Workshop wannabes1 but the fact remains. Irony + Employment Law = Funny-to-Tim.

I thought about where I should link to a definition of irony, but they were all so boring. Then I remembered this graphic which explains the debate over the concept better than I’ve ever seen it. (Caution – There’s Cursing and Grown-Up-Style Drawings on this Poster). Here’s an excerpt:

1. One time, I told one of them that I thought irony was they opposite of wrinkly, and the girl believed me. We fought about it for, like, an hour. True story. [↩]

Fiday Diversion #5: Blogging Sucks and You’re Ugly

Ed. Note: This week’s gonna be a twofer. That’s right – twice the ridiculousness for you to waste your time on. In return for my generosity, why not saunter your virtual behind over to this Lexis Nexis page announcing candidates for the Top 25 L&E blogs and vote for Current Employment in the comments?

Diversion #5, subpart (a): Blogging is Expensive

The first of our stories was chosen for two reasons:

1. It hits a little close to home for somebody arrogant enough to write their thoughts all over the internets (e.g.,this guy).
2. It gives me an excuse to congratulate my fellow employment law blogger, Phillip Miles of Lawffice Space on the birth of his baby girl!

I just had a kid 6 months ago, and I can tell you the best part about it is all the congratulations that I receive from people that I only know online. The least I can do is pay that forward, right? Plus if you click on the link to Phillip’s blog, you’ll see that, unlike those super-obnoxious bloggers that force this stuff down your throat,  he’s very humble in his announcement. So, for the second time in CE history, I’m pulling out all my web 1.0 training to make this thing pop:

Congratulations, Phillip!

Babies are the best!

Speaking of obnoxious bloggers, somehow in the midst of having a 0.1-month-old, Phillip found the time to dig up this story about a community blogger in Hennepin County, Minnesota who is paying a hefty price for doing the worst thing you can possibly do to another person on the web: tell the truth about them. From the Minneapolis Star Tribune:

Though blogger John (Johnny Northside) Hoff told the truth when he linked ex-community leader Jerry Moore to a high-profile mortgage fraud, the scathing blog post that got Moore fired justifies $60,000 in damages, a Hennepin County jury decided Friday.

What the wha?

Here’s the timeline:

• ex-community guy does bad mortgage thing
• blogger tells people about it (with choice words)
• ex-so-and-so gets fired
• ex-guy sues blogger for tortious interference with his employment contract

Tortious interference, for those of you who have regular lives, means you deliberately got in the way of somebody reaping the benefits of a contract. In other words: your blog post got me fired.

My personal opinion is that this case is bunk, and there’s no way this blogger is going to have to shell over $60k for not lying.Truthful speech has to be pretty bad to lose First Amendment protections. It’s being appealed, and he better frigging win or I will shut down this website faster than you can say “wackiest employment law cases”.

Diversion #5, subpart (b): This “Ugly” Thing Has Legs

So, two weeks ago, my Friday diversion was about a sexual harassment case1 where the employer argued there could be no harassment, because the Plaintiff was too ugly. Remember? Well, I can only assume that my blog post, and not at all this op-ed in the New York Times, touched a nerve with some bloggers. All week, folks have been discussing whether ugliness should be protected under discrimination laws.

SPOILER ALERT! It shouldn’t.

Just because something is a detriment to financial gain doesn’t mean it’s grounds for discrimination. Besides, most of the stereotypes about ugly people are true. I’m not prejudiced though; a lot of my close friends are super-ugly.

But you should read these stories about why it shouldn’t be protected, because they are fun, and one of them has a clip from Seinfeld.

One more thing:

Lots of changes coming to the land of Tim soon. If you haven’t noticed already, this includes a slow, meandering update of the blog. (I think I’ve settled on these fancy fonts. Let me know what you think.) I was going to add a “beta” to the top logo, but I don’t have that kind of gusto. So I’m throwing this down here where no one will read it, instead.

Stay tuned for changes (blog and non-blog), and critique away if you hate something.

1. Notice, this week, no sex! I did it! [↩]

Friday Diversion #3: The Old “Too Ugly” Defense…

Today’s Friday. And that means I put up a link to an employment-related news story that borders on the ridiculous.

This week’s gem is a sexual harassment suit1 brought by a former employee of a real estate company in NYC. The 23-year-old woman is alleging that at least 7 different male employees physically and emotionally harassed her, including exposing themselves and offering her $500 to watch her get busy with her girlfriend.

That, in and of itself, of course, is not newsworthy for an L&E blog. What makes this our Friday diversion is the stellar legal maneuvering of Odelia Berlianshik, owner of People’s Choice Realty.2 After making the always-bright decision to talk to nationally-recognized news outlets without being prepped by your lawyer (I hope, at least), Berlianshik defended the company by pointing out that no one would want to touch the former employee, because she’s too ugly.

Seriously.

Most of the time I try to pull some lesson from these stories. This time, the only thing I could think of is don’t tell a newspaper that the former employee/sexual harassment plaintiff they’re calling you about is lying… because she’s unattractive. For what it’s worth.

Found the story on Gothamist, which will take you to NYDN if you want the details.

1. I know its always sexual harassment. Sorry. You try and find a goofy story about the FLSA. [↩]
2. Which, I assume, hands out those awards every year. Could be wrong, though. I dont watch a lot of TV. [↩]